There is one teacher Max will never forget, but what Miss Murphy taught him wasn’t just alphabetical and to this day he still doesn’t know if she taught him the right things―it was sex education.

Little Max went to a Catholic school run by nuns and Miss Murphy, who was not a nun, taught Third Grade. She was much younger than Max’s mother and the older kids talked about how she was sexy, but he only thought that with her round happy face, blue eyes and black hair she wasn’t ugly.

The Mother Superior, leader of all the nuns, had been Max’s Second Grade teacher and that year was fuzzy except for the Humphrey-Nixon presidential election and the old Mother Superior herself. Every morning she called names and students marched up to get their homework, but when she called Max’s name she whipped his paper in the air or threw it on the ground. Maybe she didn’t do it every time although it felt like she did. “What is wrong with you?” and “Go stand in the corner!” were her favorite things to yell. Max’s parents didn’t like Nixon but the Mother Superior sure did. One day on the playground she was giving kids candy bars for shouting, “Nixon’s the One!” So Max shouted with the others but she wouldn’t even look at him.

Miss Murphy saw what happened, and she smiled at Max like no one ever did before. Instead of the nun’s bad feelings all through him were wonderful new feelings he couldn’t forget. “Don’t pay any attention to her,” she said, and touched his face.

After telling his Mom about the candy bars for Nixon, she stuck a “Humphrey for President” button on Max’s uniform and drove him back to school. The button came off the second he saw the Mother Superior’s angry face. That day she crushed Max’s homework into a ball and threw it at him. He’s still not sure if his treatment that year was political, or she just didn’t like him.            

Third Grade was all different. Max had funny feelings about Miss Murphy from the first day. She never seemed to have a sad face and her fine black hair looked so soft. Her blue eyes were always bright and under her blouse were pretty tight straps. She smelled like beautiful flowers and dressed in dark colors with knee-length skirts and shiny stockings that had a straight line in back like his Mom’s. She wore flat leather shoes the same as Jackie Kennedy, but Mrs. Kennedy had skinny legs, Miss Murphy had nice long legs and when she looked at Max she smiled and slipped her shoes on and off sometimes. She also twirled her feet and crossed her legs over and over again, and squeezed them together. Sometimes from his seat Max saw her skirt slipping up her legs, and where her stockings ended would be showing. She didn’t know it, or she didn’t bother to pull it back down right away. Max was disappointed when she finally would. He didn’t know why looking at Miss Murphy’s legs and stockings made him feel so good, but they did. After long periods his little dickie got stiff from sitting so much, though.

As the year passed, sometimes Max got punished which meant standing in the front corner of the room with Miss Murphy to one side, behind her desk. She half-faced in his direction with her knees pointing at him while she taught, like she didn’t want to leave him out. And she twirled her feet and re-crossed her legs and rubbed them against each other with an exciting sound. Or, with her hands she smoothed her stockings or pulled out a desk drawer to rest one foot on it with her other foot on the floor. Hidden from the class behind her desk, Max began to see more and more space between Miss Murphy’s legs like she didn’t care about him seeing inside. Her stockings stopped above her knees and there was a shadow in the middle of her white thighs. She glanced at Max now and then, but not to stop him looking because she didn’t change how she sat. Sometimes she licked her lips, or slipped her shoes and earrings off like his Mom did before going to bed. Maybe she glanced over to see if he was looking.

Once, his dickie got so hard it stood straight up which he did not understand the connection to, and he had to stay facing into the corner for a long, long time until it went down. She smiled a lot and didn’t send Max back to his seat either, so she knew something happened. That was the last punishment Miss Murphy gave him. At the end of the year she even wore a mini-skirt but the old Mother Superior yelled at her and she was told to go home and change back to her usual. The Mother Superior also said things that made her cry, and Max felt sad for Miss Murphy. He wanted to kiss her like he kissed his mother to make her feel better. But he was mad, too, because he wouldn’t be able to see more of Miss Murphy’s legs.

While Miss Murphy was home changing clothes the Mother Superior took over the class, and she called Max up to the desk to get his homework paper. But, she dropped it next to her boots which stuck out under her white robe. Max bent down to get the paper but she stepped on it first, just missing his fingers. Max kept trying to pull it out while she fought to keep her black boot on it. The whole class was laughing. And, when Max looked up she was smiling but it was ugly, her mouth was all crooked. Then she kicked the homework at him and made believe nothing happened.

The climax of Max’s feelings came during the final Graduation Pageant held for the parents. The class sang songs with choruses of “Row, Row, Row Your Boat!” But, when Max saw Miss Murphy dressed in her tight little sailor costume his feelings shot through the roof. It was a red, white and blue bathing suit, high heel shoes and stockings which ran all the way up and looked like fish net. She was pretty for sure—he knew that! When she walked around the stage and then she sat down right next to him it was thrilling! It also made him feel confused and sad at the same time, though. The year was over so maybe this was the last time he would see her. And, when they sang their songs for the audience little Max sang his heart out as they merrily rowed their boat next to each other. They were laughing. Her face shined from having so much fun and her legs opened and pumped in rhythm to the music with him. He had another stiff dickie and was scared and excited too, realizing it was all because of his feelings for Miss Murphy. That night there weren’t enough choruses of “Row, Row, Row Your Boat” for him!

His thought was right about her. During the summer he went on an errand for his mother and walked by the school which was on top of a hill. From a distance he saw the Mother Superior and the other nuns sitting at an outdoor table with Miss Murphy. By now he could spot her perfect round face a mile away. She rose from the table with the nuns and everybody was smiling. She shook all their hands and seemed to be thanking them. They did likewise, but Max had a feeling they were doing it to part ways forever. The sadness of the pageant hit him all over again. So, he continued on his way for a few more minutes while thinking over and over about chasing after Miss Murphy just to say Hello, or Good-bye.

He took a wild chance and ran after her. Sometimes she waited for the bus at the bottom of the hill and maybe she would today. Just like he wished she was there waiting, sitting on a bench and wearing a mini-skirt, too. So she wouldn’t be working for the Mother Superior again, he could see that! All her white skin made Max think about those legs rowing hard with him again.            

“Miss Murphy…”            

She looked up. “Oh…” She changed from a surprised face to a happy one. “Well, Hello, there, Max. What are you doing here?”

He wanted to touch her or kiss her, it felt so good to be near her again, but neither of them did anything. “I’m getting some stuff for my mother and I saw you talking to the Mother Superior.”

“Yes.” She looked down at his shoes and pants and made an angry face. “But, how come you’re such a mess? Your shirt’s not even tucked in right.” Then she smiled. “Come on over here.”

So Max walked up to her and she grabbed his sleeve and belt like his Mom would. “Doesn’t your mother make sure your belt and pants are on right?” She smelled so beautiful. She unbuckled his belt and began straightening his shirt and pants. “You missed a loop, too.”

Max started to lose his breath, almost dizzy with good feelings. “First of all, a man doesn’t wear his belt and pants like this.” She unzipped him halfway, and pulled his pants down enough to fix and tuck in the shirt real tight. Max let her do anything while they glanced at each other.

She almost looked like his mother as she handled the belt and shirt―but not like his mother because he started to have more amazing feelings down there! All he heard was the belt buckle jingle and a snap of his shirt. His legs lost feeling and his heart went crazy. Max could only stare at Miss Murphy’s pretty happy face up so close to him, and thought of the Virgin Mary. He just wanted to lean toward her, to hug and kiss her like he kissed his mother and little statues of the Virgin. She found the missing loop and was buckling the belt, and now his shirt was almost fixed. When she grabbed his zipper and yanked it up all the way to tighten it, his face touched hers very softly like he was falling into a warm pillow cloud, and their cheeks rubbed. Max’s little dickie felt funny in that great way again and started sticking up. So he kissed her fast, not like he kissed Mom, but right on her lips. And she didn’t stop him, she didn’t even look surprised, she just smiled.

Then, Max lost his balance, couldn’t feel his legs and almost fell over on top of her he was so dizzy. But he grabbed onto her legs to keep standing. They felt so smooth and warm. She rose off the bench and put an arm around Max to hold him up. “It’s okay, I understand…” she told him, and he really thought she knew about his feelings and liked him too.

Suddenly her bus came, and after touching his face and hair one last time she stepped onto the bus to pay her money. But Max couldn’t let her go, she’d be gone forever. “Don’t go, Miss Murphy! I love you! More than anyone else! I hate my sister and my parents just tell me what to do. Please don’t go!”

For a few seconds she stopped on the bus step above him, her long legs and flat leather shoes showing the teeny cracks between her toes. “How sweet you are, Max.” They stared and stared at each other as little Max’s body kept shaking. Miss Murphy’s beautiful face and fine black hair shined in the sunlight. “Good-bye…” she told him. “Someday you will make a girl very, very happy. Just wait.” She made a funny sound like she couldn’t breathe for a second, and turned away.  

The hurt and sadness were so bad he had to cry. This was so dumb to have run after her. And now she was gone. The doors closed and the bus made a lot of dust and noise as the motor roared and wheels blew up the street dirt. He could still see her inside but she wouldn’t look at him. It was nothing like the Mother Superior when she wouldn’t look at him on the playground, this was the deepest feeling Max ever had.

A month later he found out she moved far away and the school was sold to a developer, that was the end of everything but the sadness was gone. Those thrilling feelings Miss Murphy showed him he had inside he wanted to feel again and again and again. All he wanted to do the rest of his life was make a girl like her happy.